Joel Vernier

This time of year is very confusing; I have out all four seasons, spring, summer, fall, and winter weights of throw blankets for my “Comfy Chair!” 

A few days ago, it was 71 degrees, then 60 and 22 all in one day, and tomorrow it’s going to be 15 degrees for the high. I have all four seasons of coats in the back of my car. 

In Michigan, we can have all four seasons in one day! You cannot go out this time of year with one coat! Hats or caps are the same way. I leave on some mornings with a heavy hat with ear warmers, then switch to a warm hat; next is the summer heat with the bill and then back to one of the warmer hats at the end of the day. 

The goal, of course, is to just be comfortable. On days that I leave the house with 20 degrees and before 1 p.m., it’s 60 degrees, I would be sweating in my winter coat. Yes, I have a heater in the car, but I’m halfway to town before the heat kicks in.

I plan to have a rotating closet in the master bedroom in my next dream house. It will rotate around with four sides, spring, summer, winter and fall. How convenient, you would have the ability to spin and win like a game show, “Door number one! Door number two!” Which door should I choose today?

If you are home, you could go back as the temperature changes, hang up your morning clothes, and spin to the appropriate door for the afternoon temperatures. You might not even need to clean your shirt if you only wore it for a couple of hours.

I loved looking at the shoe rack Goldie Hawn had built for her in the movie “Overboard!” Imagine one level for boots, one for dress shoes, one for tennis shoes, one for casual shoes, how wonderful!

I remember one year that it snowed in the morning, I shoveled it off the walks and the driveway, and later that day, I mowed the grass, then hung up Christmas decorations! The weather is not like this in other states. We took a trip to Kuai in the Hawaiian Islands. We checked into our condo, the ceiling fans were slowly rotating, and I looked around for the air conditioner. Concerned, I went to the rental office and asked where they were. 

The manager looked at me like I was an idiot (debatable, I get it) and stated, “Sir, we don’t have those, no need for them, we are in the trade winds, our temperature between March and August stays within 72 and 77 degrees. The fans do nicely!”

Wow, can you imagine that? I wonder how the electric company can survive. Last summer, we turned off our air conditioning in the afternoon (when you need it most) to save money. I would love to live in an area that averages 75 degrees. Santa Barbara comes close. Loja, Ecuador is spot on. The Canary Islands would work at average 80 degrees every day, and Central Valley, Costa Rica 72-75 degrees every day. 

I really don’t like moving; I’ve moved five times in my life. I might have to learn a new language and how to exchange money for local funds. I’m sure the foods and cultures are different. I would have to take my dogs with me and miss my family and friends. I guess I will just stay put.

“Remember, every day is a gift! Some are just a little more fun to open than others.” – © Joel M. Vernier 03/26/2022 Author of: “The Guinea Pig In The Freezer.” joelmvernier@aol.com.

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